Re: Introduction to the list

From: Kevin Legault <kevin.legault_at_gnb.ca>
Date: Mon 14 Feb 2005 10:18:08 -0600

Lynn Bishop wrote:

>Actually this has probably been discussed, but I was reading the other day,
>about writing good copy for websites, and one of the things he said was that
>websites are far to impersonal, and people like to feel they "Know" the
>person they are contacting....

I usually just "lurk," but I like to jump in from time to time. I hope
this snippet helps to make your messages more meaningful for your
clients :)

Writing effective "copy" or any other type of business related writing
depends upon your understanding of three important items:
1. Knowing "why" you are writing (What is your purpose? What action do
you want your client to take after he/she has read your copy?)
2. Knowing and understanding your audience
3. Stating clearly how the client will benefit from doing business with
you. What makes your company "unique"?

Too many companies write about "we," "our," and "I." I call this the
"egotistical" or "vanity" approach: Look how wonderful we
are...yadayadayada. If you want to include your audience, write more
using "you" and "your" and clearly stating audience benefits.

Example:
(Standard) We have taken family portraits for twenty years, and all of
our customers have been extremely satisfied.
(Improved) Preserve your precious memories on film for years to come.
Twenty years of experience and thousands of satisfied customers ensure
that your family memories will be embraced for generations.

When constructing your message, please make sure that the "you" and
"your" outweigh the "I" and "we" by about three to one (3:1). This ratio
is called the "empathy" index. Using "empathy" should help to make any
message less "impersonal" and more "inclusive."

Kevin Legault, B.A., B.Ed., I.S.S.
Instructor, Business Studies
Tel: (506) 658-6703
Email: < mailto:kevin.legault_at_gnb.ca>
Web: < http://www.saintjohn.nbcc.nb.ca>
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Received on Mon Feb 14 2005 - 10:18:08 CST